What does dying ask of us? Notes from a friend’s death bed, and the words of Stephen Jenkinson
My friend had been under hospice care for weeks, in and out of consciousness for days. “I don’t know what my dying will look like,” he told an out-of-state caller as I held the phone by his pillow. “Maybe Holly knows.”
I was shocked, and dismayed. This beloved man was 20 years my elder. I had hoped to learn something about dying from him.
We know so little about endings, in the perpetually young, endless frontier culture of the West. The time that might be devoted to befriending the end of one’s days is so often expended on the hope agenda, on “not giving up”.
And so it was with my friend, still hoping for a reprieve, that the dying he was in the midst of was unrecognizable to him. Read More